Artistic Swimming is financially secure
How Synchronised/Artistic Swimming invests in itself
Historic investments and long term strategies
Historic Background
In 1980, non-profit synchro teams across the country pooled their excess cash to raise $300. They made significant sacrifices but a revolutionary startup assured them of a significant return on investment.
The firm was developing a device that enabled humans to work in non-atmospheric pressure environments. Success would benefit synchronised swimming and lead to military, deep sea diving, and even aeronautical applications.
Every Synchro CFO approved of the business case
The firm was called Pince-Nez and offered a return of 4,007,923% in three years. Synchro team's Chief Financial Officers collectively examined this claim.
Pince-Nez's business case was strong as it used Billy Rose's Aquacade at the New York World's Fair of 1939 as the case study. The Aquacade was the most successful feature of this extravaganza in Flushing Meadows.
Millions paid for admission to see America's "Vision of the future". It included many newly designed art nouveau buildings, landscape features such as lakes, displays, entertainment for adults and children, and lectures. Luminaries designed and conducted the operation including Salvatore Dali. President Roosevelt opened the village.
Thousands of spectators saw the Aquacade. Mermaids and mermen performed water ballet in an enormous purpose built lake. It starred Olympians Eleanor Holm and Johnny Weissmuller.
Unfortunately the war brought a halt to this mood elevating event, and it closed after 6 months.
Pince-Nez's technological innovation
Synchro's terms of agreement for investment would be that the device be portable, small, removable, light weight, affordable, robust, non-toxic, and comfortable. Pince-Nez's drawings were based on a 1920s German design:
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| A German Concept |
A confidence trickster. Cheers! Harry the Hat.
The confidence trickster owner died leaving the company to a fellow militant Communist and the ($300) stake to synchronised swimming. The nose clip project ended. Synchro were never informed and their investment was managed by a furloughed Communist.
The Communists continued with the founder's objective to prove that Capitalism was immoral and abused the proletariat. Pince-Nez invested capital into highly risky companies in the belief that failure would be assured.
$300 bought one share of an investment company that owned a New England textile mill - capitalism in action.
By 2020, that single Breathless Takeaway share was worth $105 million. In 2018, Breathless Takeaway's corporate value was $250 billion, annual revenue $500 million, and the CEO is the fourth richest man in the world.
Capitalism ensures proletariat fish
Since 1980 the original group of synchro teams have merged, disbanded, and collapsed. Only three coaches are still alive. One of them married Chuck in March 1981. He is now Vice President of Breathless Takeaway.
Unbeknownst to this doting wife, as one of three shareholders, she pays Chuck's wages. It clearly demonstrates that any male involvement in the sport is accidental and reflects the culture of strong women eg the current CEO of USA Artistic Swimming appears male.
I zoomed the three experienced synchro coaches yesterday. Although blind and technologically illiterate, they responded to the baton tapping used poolside when they coached.
Agasp, teeth fell out.
How will they spend their excess capital?
With youthful exuberance, they agreed to buy nose clips for Artistic Swimmers in perpetuity.
The design
In a Parkinsonian way, they recalled Cartier's classic Juste Un Clou collection of the 1970s as a portable, small, removable, light weight, (now) affordable, robust, non-toxic, and comfortable design. Still available by special order, the nose clips would be based on the Juste Un Clou model (32 diamonds (0.52 karat) set on 18k gold with Synchro Art Clearwater Revival engraved on the stud:
Current retail price sans gravure: $11,800 excl sales tax
Avec gravure: $79,890.30 (reminiscent of the highest technical routine score of yesteryear).
Chuck shrugged his shoulders and claimed vindication. He always said that he owed everything to his wife. Although an elderly man, he was moved to know that their descendants would be better prepared for the evolutionary return of humans to the water as proletarian fish.
Conclusion
How American synchronised/artistic swimming invested in its sport guides current investments.